Max Baucus Reveals He is Really Bacchus, God of Wine, Speaks Drunk on Senate Floor

Senator Max Baucus shocked the world last week when he revealed that he is actually Bacchus, the Roman God of Wine.  Senator Baucus is actually the secret identity taken by Bacchus, as he has wandered the world experience life among mortals.

“Yesh, it’sh true,” said Bacchus.  “I am really Bathus the God of Wines.  And thersh jush one think I want.  Other than wine of coursh.  And that’s helf care.  Wine drunkersh have needs for helf care.  Lotsh of needs.  And that means helf care is, uh, a uh, ist needs to get done.  Now I’m off to Napa.”