Obama Declares National Debt Too Big to Fail

After reaching over $12 trillion dollars in size, President Obama declared that the federal debt is too big to fail and should be given a bailout.

“Our country cannot afford to have the national debt fail,” said Obama.  “The consequences would be disastrous.  If the debt fails, then that would set off a chain reaction around the world with catastrophic results.  We need a bailout package in order to stabilize the health of the debt so that it doesn’t go under.  It doesn’t matter how much we need to borrow in order to keep it alive, as the alternative is unfathomable.  I am asking Congress to approve a $4 trillion dollar bailout package that will be given to the debt.  The money can be borrowed from the current deficit and repaid over time with tax increases on the wealthy.”

When a Fox News reporter asked if it made sense to borrow money in order to save debt, she was shouted down by other journalists.  But President Obama did respond to the question, explaining that “I made a promise to the American people, and I intend to keep that promise.  Can you imagine what would happen if we didn’t borrow that money to save the debt?  You can run your confusing and biased stories all you want, but that doesn’t change the fact that this nation as we know it may come to an end if we don’t take action now.”

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